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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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What would life be like without women? A pain in the a$$.
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10-21-2011 11:03
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Remember when phones were stupid and people were smart? Good times
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10-21-2011 10:56
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Iron Man is a super hero. Iron Woman is a command
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10-21-2011 10:52
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Today's agenda: get out of bed fast enough to see my body imprint in the memory foam matress before it disappears.
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10-21-2011 10:49 by
flinnie
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I hope your affairs are in order. Harold Camping says today is rapture day. Again.
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10-21-2011 10:48 by
flinnie
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Annie was an orphan because she was a filthy, disgusting, ginger child who wouldn't stop singing
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10-21-2011 10:37 by
Joseph Robert
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No one told me another rapture was scheduled for today! WTF, I'm not prepared.......
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10-21-2011 10:31 by
sully
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If there was a game show based off of Mario Party, I would definitely want to be on it,
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10-21-2011 09:53 by
g0re
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Since we start counting at one, zero is"countless." Therefore, I have slept with countless girls.
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10-21-2011 09:29 by
g0re
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“One man's trash is another man's treasure” is an awesome phrase, but it's a horrible way to tell your kid they're adopted.
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10-21-2011 09:28 by
g0re
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If a woman is talking in the forest and no ones around to hear her, is she still wrong?
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10-21-2011 09:09
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Take two, you know you got good bud when you stink up the whole HOUSE before you spark it. Sorry I'm high :D
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10-21-2011 08:25 by
Dopey420
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Some play hard to get, I play hard to want.
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10-21-2011 08:22 by
Jackbrass
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The worries that I bury in my mind continue to pop up like Thriller zombies who can't dance.
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10-21-2011 06:39 by
flinnie
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If Paranormal Activity 3, The Ring, and Poltergeist taught me anything, it's that little girls are absolutely terrifying.
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10-21-2011 06:39 by
flinnie
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The Wizard of Oz is really just a cautionary tale about the lengths a woman will go to for the right shoes.
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10-21-2011 04:04
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Youtube needs to fix the comment section so you don't need to search through 10 pages to find the start of an argument.
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10-21-2011 02:59 by
g0re
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If you are the "other person" in a relationship and eventually get together, you have no reason to be angry if they cheat on you later.
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10-21-2011 02:50 by
g0re
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Get ready for a thousand Gaddafi jokes *yawn*
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10-21-2011 02:44
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RIP Gaddafi. No? Ok.
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10-21-2011 02:32
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