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for a perfectly shaved forearm reach for the last Pringle in the can....
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11-07-2011 07:43 by
Lu
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I'd imagine homeless people aren't the fans of little dogs wearing sweaters
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11-07-2011 07:41 by
Lu
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i hate sitting comfortably on the couch and then discocering that my phone is more than an arm's length away. Also more than a leg's length away.
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11-07-2011 07:40 by
Lu
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They say real woman have curves. Well then... the woman sitting in front of me at the theatre is a real, real, real, real, real, real woman.
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11-07-2011 07:36
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I don't care what the expiration date says, I have to smell it
100
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11-07-2011 07:33 by
Lu
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I wonder if AM realises how bad it sucks compared to PM and FM?
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11-07-2011 07:32 by
Lu
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Auctioneers are proof that white guys could rap if they wanted to
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11-07-2011 07:31 by
Lu
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No wonder my cigar tastes funny... its just a really old hotdog
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11-07-2011 07:27 by
Lu
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I love pressing buttons, so as you can imagine this makes it really difficult for me to be around nipples
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11-07-2011 07:23 by
Lu
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looks like the only black and yellow we have to worry about is the cute little bumblebee.
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11-07-2011 07:06 by
buff
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The only correct answer to "Are you ticklish?" is "I have explosive diarrhea right now."
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11-07-2011 06:56 by
flinnie
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Why do people adopt insults that are directed at other people and take them personal, make them their own?
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11-07-2011 06:56
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People are so quick to shoot down my conspiracy theory that the Illuminati blew up the Challenger just to ruin Punky Brewster's dreams.
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11-07-2011 06:44 by
flinnie
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If you blow my high, you owe me weed.
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11-07-2011 05:43
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Jack and Jill went up the hill so he could lick her candy, but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck 'cause Jills real name is Randy
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11-07-2011 05:41
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Kiss me before I brush my teeth in the morning so I know your love is real.
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11-07-2011 05:37
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Osama Bin Laden ✔ Saddam Hussein ✔ Gadaffi ✔ Ciara's toes ✔ Lebron's hairline ✔ Souljaboy's career ❒
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11-07-2011 05:33
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I am not addicted to weed, I only smoke it 2 times a year on my birthday and when its not my birthday.
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11-07-2011 05:32
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Your sex is on fire...? No slut... thats called herpes.
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11-07-2011 05:31
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~• ~• ~• ~• ~• ~• ~• ~• ~• ~•
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11-07-2011 05:26
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