Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Halloween. When guys dress up like the psychos they actually are. And girls dress up like the sluts they swear they aren't.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 06:42 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cop to a hooker: What would your mother do if she seen you out here doing this? Hooker: She'd kill me, this is her corner.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 06:32 by Jackbrass Comments (0)  


   messageicon The 'unlike' button is the closest we are ever gonna get to a 'dislike' button.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:58 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have just created a new Facebook group called, "I am using my neighbour's wi-Fi"
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon didn't know K. Kardashian was married, in the first place!!!
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Damnnn, We about to get it cracking, like fat people on thin ice
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't care about 11/11/11, the day I cant wait for is 6/9/69
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What happens in Vegas stays on Facebook.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Attention Ladies : No Shave November is meant for men not women.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Go a whole year without wearing weave so I know its real.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kim Kardashian's marriage was shorter than a midgets tie
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:36 by @BoyGotJokes Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just ran into a girl I've jerked it to on facebook...met her for the first time in public today...let's just say...wat a creeper
←Rate | 11-01-2011 01:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow, I've just noticed that almost all the girls on my Facebook are girls that I've tried to hook up with at one point or another. My Facebook has suddenly become one giant reminder of pure and utter failure. Well played Facebook, well played...
←Rate | 11-01-2011 00:59 by Michek Comments (0)  


   messageicon (-.-) <--- this is my surprised face when I read about Kim's divorce.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 00:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't put habanero chili in your KY. Your mate will get quite angry.
←Rate | 11-01-2011 00:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What was longer.... Kim Kardashian's marriage or theTrick-or-Treat line outside of Casey Anthony's house??
←Rate | 11-01-2011 00:06 by J W Comments (0)  


   messageicon That awkard moment when you wake up your boyfriend in middle of night to say "stop snoring!!!" and you realize that it's the dog and not him.
←Rate | 10-31-2011 23:58 by A.S Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know we are new lovers who hooked up just recently and all but you have to stop calling me at 2 in the morning. Who besides stalkers wants to 'talk' at 2am?
←Rate | 10-31-2011 23:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon don't you occasionally go through your friends' list and think to yourself: DANG! I'd hit that....... with a truck!
←Rate | 10-31-2011 23:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm so ugly the kids gave me candy when they came to my door.
←Rate | 10-31-2011 22:35 Comments (0)  



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