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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Kids are more fun when you can give them back.
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11-29-2011 21:54 by
ff1241
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A relationship with no trust is like a cell phone with no service. You can only play games.
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11-29-2011 21:50
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Love has 4 letters, but so does Hate ; Friends has 7 letter, but so does Enemies; Truth has 5 letters, but so does Lying
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11-29-2011 21:46 by
Tha_Joka
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What's Herman Cain and Sandusky's favorite song? "It wasn't me" by singer Shaggy featuring RicRok
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11-29-2011 21:12
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Dont you just love my t!tt!es? (+ )(- ).. Its just a tit bit nipply in here!
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11-29-2011 21:07 by
Seanathon
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I just saved a bunch of money on Christmas by switching to single
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11-29-2011 20:35
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Ummm,,,,Why do all these old bands keep copying glee songs?
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11-29-2011 20:13 by
snotty
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Don't call me son unless you're going to include me in your will.
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11-29-2011 19:37 by
Seanathon
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watching football its like watching monkeys chasing a banana
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11-29-2011 19:31 by
colombianSnow
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the fact that Justin Beiber is still relevant means the terrorists have won
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11-29-2011 19:25 by
@tek577
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I have heard that if a bear approaches you in the woods...you should play dead. I think I know why. it's to get you used to what you're going to look like in a minute.
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11-29-2011 19:00
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Call me crazy but I think Herman Cain could still win this thing if everyone he groped votes for him...
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11-29-2011 18:04 by
@beaubridwell
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I DO WHAT I WANT! WHEN I WANT! WHERE I WANT!...... if Mom says its ok...
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11-29-2011 17:52 by
@OMFG_Rel8able
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floods, check...earthquake, check...hurricane...check, Locusts..where are those damn locusts?
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11-29-2011 16:45
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Hey,,Just started reading "The Chubby Checker Story". No spoilers please,,,,,,, apparently there's a twist.
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11-29-2011 16:29 by
snotty
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Billy Joel's "In the Middle of the Night" had to be inspired by a 3am piss.
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11-29-2011 16:28 by
SuthernFukr
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Are you leaning on your left elbow?
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11-29-2011 16:03 by
SylviaJem
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I WASNT GOOD IN MATH BUT WHEN IT COMES TO SEX I'm ALL ABOUT ANGLES
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11-29-2011 15:48 by
milsfinest
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I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?
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11-29-2011 15:41 by
Elf
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"I'm easy to get along with, just agree with me".
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11-29-2011 15:29
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