Trump Filter: ON | OFF
Search Messages:
Everyone wants to say this is gangster and that's gangster but nobody has the ballz to actually be a gangster and put in some work! I am one of those people! 
Oh, I can take a hint. I just choose not to.
PSA: Red Bull does NOT give you actual wings. It gives you the false sense of wings. I learned this the hard way today. Luckily the frozen ground broke my fall.
I think your first love holds the biggest piece of your heart because they made the first cut.
~~ S.I.N.G.L.E = (S)tress (I)s (N)ow (G)one, (L)oser (E)radicated.
I remember as a teenager I used to kill myself getting to a ringing telephone... Now I don't even have the ringer on.
We have several extra kids in our house that are invisible - their names are ~ "It wasn't me," "I don't know," and "Why me"
MIA No name, talent-less, trashy, low life, that can't sing will make millions by giving everyone the bird. What a low class piece of trash.
Today, I saw a couple of beetles doing it. Jealous, I quickly crushed them with my boot while screaming, "IF I CAN'T DO IT, NOBODY WILL!"
I'm surprised by the violence in Syria. I really thought the World Peace sign at the end of Madonna's halftime show would work.
Today I am bewitched, bothered, and bewildered. Also not wearing pants.
Idea: A Roomba type of device that putters around the house and then shoots a deadly laser at anyone who says "bro" a lot.
The sound of children laughing makes me happy. Unless I'm home alone and my power goes out.
I may look calm but in my head I've killed you 3 times
Girls, don't waste money tattooing your legs. They eventually become available for free. They're called varicose veins.
I'm not calling her a sl*t. I'm simply stating that if her vag had a password it would've been password.
it me or does C-lo Green look like a twacked out beetle?
Great! Now my: foods to eat, places to visit, crafts to make list just got a whole lot longer. Thanks a lot Pinterest!
Dear Giselle, you made your point that the wide receivers couldn't catch the ball. Please keep in mind that not everyone can catch a set of balls while lying on their back.
If Crunch Berries aren't considered fresh fruit I don't think this diet is going to work out. 