Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon looks like it's me and Pamela Handerson again this Valentine's Day...
←Rate | 02-14-2012 20:05 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Got a feeling that somebody is gonna get BANGED more times than a ketchup bottle tonight!!
←Rate | 02-14-2012 19:33 by Bearsfaninva Comments (0)  


   messageicon very upset!!! I had Lindsey in the Celebrity Death Pool at work.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 19:29 by Steve OH Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know, many people have an artificial Christmas tree so they can use it year after year to save money. Why not do the same thing with roses on Valentine's Day. You can leave them up until Easter- maybe hang some Hershey's Kisses on them. Quite festive.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 17:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love you in Blue...I love you in Red...But most of all...I love you in....Blue
←Rate | 02-14-2012 16:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why I walk funny: 10% I'm injured 90% Trying to unstick my balls from my leg.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 16:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My G/F said for Valentine's Day I needed to be more affectionate...so I got 2 Girlfriends! ;)
←Rate | 02-14-2012 16:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Celebrate Valentines Day responsibly, or you'll be celebrating Thanksgiving in a maternity ward
←Rate | 02-14-2012 16:14 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Perfect Plan: 1. Shoot boss with arrow. 2. Blame poor AT&T coverage for not calling 9-1-1 in time. 3. Tell police it was Cupid.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:26 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon 3-way stops make me think that one of the stops doesn't really want to do it, but wants to make the others happy.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:25 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon It doesn't matter what your conversation candy hearts say, as long as you remembered to soak them overnight in Rohypnol.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:25 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hallmark, I'll go 50/50 on this card with you: "Moisten your inbox, baby; this Valentine's coming in hard."
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:24 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon If we never covered up our genitals, they'd never smell. Happy Valentines Day!
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:22 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Great! My girlfriend's period just came. My bloody Valentine.
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon roses are red violets are blue.....and since I'm single my balls will be too
←Rate | 02-14-2012 15:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon roses are red, violets are blue, vodka is cheaper then dinner for two
←Rate | 02-14-2012 14:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should make her feel like everyday is Valentine's day : )
←Rate | 02-14-2012 14:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Michael jackson died 1day before the BET AWARDS....Amy Whinehouse died 1day before the VMA'S and whitney houston died 1day before the GRAMMYs...so are we Expected to expect more pre award and post award deaths?!
←Rate | 02-14-2012 14:32 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are red. Rotting flesh is green. When the dead start to rise, I want you on my team!!!!
←Rate | 02-14-2012 14:01 by Reznor Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I owe my right hand a Valentines Day card!
←Rate | 02-14-2012 13:49 by David Comments (0)  



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