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The world is falling apart, yet there are m0r0ns chasing Pokemon characters all around town. Where's the comet already. 
Talk about negative calorie foods, I expended more energy trying to open my string cheese than I derived from eating it.
so apparently being " A Kid At Heart" does not apply when it comes to Pokemon go. Pshh...Please. I'm a grown A** Man. now where did I leave my Xbox contoller
Sir, That is not a Pokemon in the car behind you with those flashing lights ... It's a cop so pull over.
Pokemon is the Japanese word for Revenge.
Who needs coffee when you can meet up for jagerbombs on a Thursday morning.
There are only two seasons in America: Flu and Mosquito.
Gnomes Favorite Song: I'm Sexy and I Gnome It.
Awesome Fact: All baseball players are bilingual they speak English and profanity.
I wish Noah would have swatted those two mosquitos.
Coming This Fall On HBO: Game of Loans. Move over medieval times, it's university life at it's finest in 2016.
Final Brexit tally is in: 48% Sense and Sensibility, 52% Pride and Prejudice.
If a Canadian falls in the forest and no one is around, does he still apologize?
At least we Americans can feel better today knowing Canada's national animal is a rodent.
Maybe broccoli doesn't like you either....
Facebook is a lot like ancient Egypt, people write on walls and worship cats.
Whitesplaining: To paternalistically lecture people of color as to what is and isn't racism which ironically reveals racism.
Holy Crap ..... I just found a Pokemon in my Toilet!!!
I must have an amazing Butt because every time I walk away from someone they say ... "What an ass."
If I were of Chinese descend and a multi Millionaire. I would change my name to Cha Ching. . . 