Funny Status Messages

   You think you're having a bad day, you could be a Siamese twin attached to a gay brother who has a date and you're the only one with an ass.

   America is in labor now, in a few short hours we will find out if it's a boy or a girl.

   As I walk through Walmart......all the sudden the election makes sense.

   33,000 people attended Hillary clintons rally/ concert yesterday. I wonder if they received the tickets via email..

   Welcome back to 1956!

   I'm too tired to stay awake and watch... It feels like this U.S. Election night is Christmas Eve, and America's worried Santa might leave coal and sticks instead of presents in the morning.

   Breaking News! So quiet at the Clinton camp you could hear Bill's pants drop! 😉

   Waiting for the election results is like waiting for a grade on a group project. I know I did my shi$ right but I'm worried ya'll F'd it up..

   america just had a big brain fart. oups it's america they just have farts no brain!!

   This is scarier night then Halloween.

   This is what happens when the Cubs win the World Series.

   Stop saying you're moving out of the country. You can't even move out of your parents house so you're not going anywhere. Shut up already.

   Watching the media CRASH AND BURN is a joke in itself.

   ''It's the end of the world as we know it'' -REM

   Canadas imagration website has crashed. No joke.

   The polls show Hillary has an 87% chance of going to prison after tonight.

   "We used all our brainwashing techniques and we still lost" - US Media

   tomorrow, a very large shipment of President Clinton merchandise will get shipped to some under developed country

   Hey .... Anybody know the name of a good Psychiatrist? .... Whoah ... For the loser .... Not for me!! ... The Loser of the American Presidential election.

   Well it's official; Reality TV has completely destroyed America