Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Just started the all donut diet, or as I like to call it, Glazed Anatomy.
←Rate | 02-05-2010 05:20 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon They said the baby looked like me. Until they turned him the right way up.
←Rate | 02-05-2010 05:20 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kentucky man wins 128 million dollar lottery. Says he will share winnings with his wife and sister. Lucky woman!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 05:22 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never hit a man with glasses! A baseball bat does the job MUCH better!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 09:39 by Talsier Comments (0)  


   messageicon when love is in the air I put on my gas mask.
←Rate | 02-05-2010 09:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon won't be drinking alone tonight.......the verizon network will be with with her!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 10:09 by Annelise Comments (0)  


   messageicon now in subsmission to the power of great stupidity
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon saw a naked man running down his road. I rolled down the car window and asked "hey why are you running stark naked " to which the naked man replied "because you are home early....."
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:27 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Everytime I hear the dirty word "excercise", I wash my mouth with chocolate.....
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:32 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In life, success is determined by the amount of sh!t you can take
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon veni, vidi, velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around...
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:53 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits"
←Rate | 02-05-2010 12:17 by NYSNOBDRX Comments (0)  


   messageicon masticating in a crowded restaurant.
←Rate | 02-05-2010 12:24 by dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Celebrating 6 yrs of a social epidemic.Congrats Facebook for connecting people with friends;old,new,and weird. Using up people's time online. Poking as many women as possible.F*cking up relationships/marriages,and checking up on people's exaggerated lives
←Rate | 02-05-2010 12:57 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon is doing "The Pee Pee Dance!". Not because I have to go... I just think it's a cool dance...
←Rate | 02-05-2010 13:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon now that she's gone, Hands back into my pants!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 13:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Finally got Laid... And you all thought It would never happen!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 13:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon after so much studying , he is going to PASS his BAR tonight!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 13:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks if adam and eve were chinese they would have eaten the snake instead of the apple!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 13:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Taylor Swift has applied for a patent for her invention of a new musical key.
←Rate | 02-05-2010 15:07 Comments (0)  



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