Rick H. Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Ever notice how that toothpaste falls so easily off your brush, but you can't wash it down the drain if you wanted to....
←Rate | 08-21-2011 13:01 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon After several hours of intense negotiating at the car dealership, I'm happy to say that I'm the proud owner of a 30ft. inflatible Gorilla...Yeah baby.....
←Rate | 06-21-2011 14:45 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a license plate yesterday that said "I miss New York", so I smashed their window and snatched their laptop...
←Rate | 05-18-2011 00:44 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Three things I cannot do: (1) pass up a piece of cake, (2) say "rural" and (3) open a can of biscuits without yelling when it pops.
←Rate | 05-20-2011 09:43 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Mrs. Dugger, its a vagina not a clown car.
←Rate | 11-08-2011 17:49 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tonights Forecast in Libya: A beautiful full blue moon followed by a sky filled with long range missiles and a great air show.
←Rate | 03-19-2011 13:08 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon America... the only country in the world where not buckling your child in a seatbelt carries a bigger penalty than murdering your child.
←Rate | 07-05-2011 17:27 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon It is by far the most beautiful lump of coal you have ever seen..
←Rate | 12-25-2011 09:32 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to write out my self-worth in roman numerals. It looks so much more impressive.
←Rate | 07-13-2011 12:19 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon People in Arkansas are curious if this health plan is going to cover tooth whitening.
←Rate | 06-28-2012 18:59 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watched way too much Shark week episodes last week. I fell off a pool float yesterday in the pool and started panicking.....
←Rate | 08-08-2011 12:01 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can we have a NO Kathy Griffin button?
←Rate | 06-02-2017 13:58 by Rick H. Comments (3)  


   messageicon I have coughed so much this week I think I'm developing 6-pack abs.
←Rate | 02-08-2012 12:40 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon OMG! Anyone know the number of the water treatment plant? I need to let em know I just sent something their way that is going to cause trouble when it gets there....Lordy Lordy Lordy!
←Rate | 07-28-2011 23:18 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I should have ordered only half a horse. No way, I can eat all this..
←Rate | 09-12-2012 21:51 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do they have to play movies so loud at the theatre? I litterally have to scream into my phone.
←Rate | 03-04-2012 00:23 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Haven't heard Obama say one thing about getting rid of Jersey Shore..
←Rate | 01-24-2012 22:06 by Rick h. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever decided this Halloween candy is the "fun" size is not someone I care to party with.
←Rate | 10-14-2011 18:12 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon They should make a app for the IPhone that yells "Code Blue Stat" when the battery is weak.
←Rate | 12-29-2011 10:17 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm terrible with people's names. For example: I've known this guy Steve for years and just realized her name is actually Stacy.
←Rate | 10-29-2011 15:07 by Rick H. Comments (0)  



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