@kalleygirl Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon The Wizard Of OZ is 74 years old. Today, if Dorothy were to encounter men with no brains, no heart and no balls, she wouldn't be in Oz, she would be in congress!! 😂😆😀
←Rate | 04-23-2015 17:37 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon The Wizard of Oz is 70 years old. Today, if Dorothy were to encounter men with no brains, no hearts, and no balls, she wouldn't be in Oz. She would be in congress...
←Rate | 11-21-2015 06:09 by @kalleygirl Comments (1)  

   messageicon When a guy says he's looking for a "Country Girl" that doesn't mean he's looking for a girl that's been plowed more times then the family farm. 🐽🐮
←Rate | 01-08-2016 22:53 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why are we supposed to give special treatment to Black Friday, i'm just gonna come out and say it #ALLFRIDAYSMATTER
←Rate | 11-22-2015 20:19 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Forget Klondike, you should see what people do for open bar!
←Rate | 01-31-2014 08:07 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon I bet more people call the gambling addicts helpline if they made every 10th caller a winner! ♠♥♣♦😃😳
←Rate | 04-24-2015 11:08 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon They say money can't buy you happiness, but I've got a receipt from the liquor store telling a whole different story.
←Rate | 01-31-2014 08:19 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Twerking and Selfie have been added to the dictionary. Future and Optimism have been removed.
←Rate | 02-12-2014 11:04 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon You know, if Facebook is conflicting with your real life relationships then it's time to take a break. We need your full commitment over here!
←Rate | 11-21-2015 15:35 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon To all those who received a book from me as a Christmas gift.... 📕📗 They are due back at the library today. 😂😂😂
←Rate | 01-08-2016 22:51 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Remember Snooki? Yeah me neither, it's like she disappeared! That's because she went back to her real name, Danny Devito... 😂
←Rate | 01-08-2016 22:52 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon When I was younger I always wanted to marry a doctor for money. Now I just want the prescriptions.
←Rate | 04-21-2015 22:48 by @kalleygirl Comments (2)  

   messageicon There are so many scams on the Internet now these days, but for $19.95 I can show you how to avoid them. 👌🏻
←Rate | 01-08-2016 22:52 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon SCOOBY DOO taught us that all the REAL monsters ARE human... 🙈🙉🙊
←Rate | 11-21-2015 13:04 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "feel horrible I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment." The husband replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfec
←Rate | 11-21-2015 12:55 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon A wife is like a hand grenade. Remove the ring, and your house is gone... 💍💍💍😂😂😂
←Rate | 11-21-2015 12:57 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why is Kim K. like KFC? After you've finished with the thighs and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in. 🍗🍖🤑🤑😂😂😂
←Rate | 11-21-2015 12:58 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters? Do they just give you a bra and say, "here fill this out"... 😀😳😜
←Rate | 05-19-2015 07:19 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been..." "Ma'am, please just vote and exit the booth!
←Rate | 11-21-2015 13:07 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  

   messageicon Scientists have discovered that there is intelligent DNA in some women. Unfortunately, 95% of them spit it out.
←Rate | 01-30-2014 11:00 by @kalleygirl Comments (0)  


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