ZZZ-FUXY Funny Status Messages

   At a wedding reception someone yelled: "All the married men please stand next to the person that made your life worth living…" The bartender was crushed to death…

   Not all the men are in the relationships for sex. Some just want a good sandwich and a blow job…

   I bought a pack of condoms and the cashier asked me, "Do you need a bag?" I replied, "No she isn't that ugly."

   Just held the door open for an old Asian man. He said “sank you!” He better not be referring to Pearl Harbor…!

   Your ass must be super jealous of all of the sh*t coming out of your mouth…

   Went from being “in relationship” to being “single.” Modern Warfare 3 claims its first victim!

   Math questions are so freaking stupid! Like for example “If I had 30 chocolate bars and I eat 29, what do I have?” Hmmm…. I dunno… Diabetes maybe???