The Legal Eagle Funny Status Messages

   ... Knife-wielding intruder tries 2 break into Paris Hilton's home. So? 1 time, a forkwielding Kirstie Alley tried 2 break into my refrigerator!

   ....Nick Cannon still mum on Mariah pregnancy. They're obviously waiting to make sure she doesn't have a bigger miscarriage than “Glitter.”

   ...Singer Morrisey says Chinese are a “subspecies.” Sorry I'd write more but there's a subspecies at my door with my dinner