Mikey c Funny Status Messages

   Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, & nothing but the truth" ... I choose dare, your honor

   Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie in the apocalypse is all the walking.

   I’d like to see the dollar store get a liquor license.

   *smashes bag of Oreos and pours it on salad* Eating healthy is great

   I don't drink water anymore, not after what it did to the Grand Canyon

   why call it a tree trimmer and not branch manager

   I hope Mexico doesn't raise the cost of Tequila to pay for this wall.