Massolare Funny Status Messages

   Guys, guys...we Americans are not obsessed with dead hookers. Those are British fashion models.

   When one's heart is filled with the desire for earthly things, there is no room left for the spirituality of God.

   After all these years, I finally figured out the reason why The Professor never got the castaways off Gilligan's Island, while we all know that he very well could have. He was doing both Ginger AND Maryann.

   Florida residents should be grateful for two things: Jersey Shore and NJ Governor Christie. Between them both, they've catapulted New Jersey to the #1 spot in the "Stupidest State in The USA" competition.

   Whenever I think I've come up with something very twisted, and I'm a horrible person for it, I simply remember that some nut in South America named the largest body of water there Lake Titicaca.

   Scientists can't decide if eggs are bad for you, how many planets we have, or how old the Earth is....let alone what began the universe. Based on their lack of consistency and plausibility, I'm going with the God theory.

   Saturdays hold the distinction of being the day of the week that has the least amount of facebook activity. It's good to know that many folks still have a life 1/7 of the time.

   I try to make things last by saving them for a while, which bring me to this moment. It will be bittersweet, I can tell you that. I'm going to enjoy this, but it will also make me sad. I'm about to have my last Easter Egg.