MR Funny Status Messages

   Everyone has that friend in the group that everyone hates but just keeps them around for the sole reason of hating him. If you think that's not the case in your group, then you're that friend.

   I walked into a party last night and someone yelled, "dibbs!"

   My friend asked me if his car's blinker worked. I checked and said: yes, no, yes, no, yes, no.

   Ask: "Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger?" (No.) Wink.

   What do you call a black guy in a three piece suit? A: Will the defendant please rise?