Choot Choot Funny Status Messages

   My next pet is going to be named "Peeve."

   Doctor: Are you sexually active? Me: No. I just lay there.

   I'm me. I like me. It took me a while to realize it, but I have no other choice. I'm stuck with myself.

   I have 250 mutual friends with this one guy on facebook. The weird thing is that I like all of them way better than him.

   There's no such thing as a Chubby "Chaser"...chubby folks can't run very fast.

   I'm sick of women who label themselves as a BBW. All of you who say you're a BBW are just Big Bodied Whales. Stop trying to make yourself feel better for being 5'5 and 200 lbs by saying you're a big beautiful woman.

   Why can't I be like the other guys that I know, and just be happy with an ugiy f@t girl?

   There's nothing hotter than a f@t girl in stockings. Not appearance wise, I'm talking temperature.