BB Funny Status Messages

   this chick I was talking to told me on facebook to stop calling/texting her because she lost her phone. Right under her post was "sent from facebook for iPhone.

   Today, I was rejected by a girl when she told me she is not ready to date. We met on a dating website

   When you cut the head off a snake, it doesn't die right away, it's still dangerous. The war on terror is NOT over, just yet.

   Just because you have headphones in your ears blocking external sound, does not mean your farts to not make noise.

   I love running my fingers through my girlfriend's hair. It's also a great way to let her know we're out of napkins.

   911: What is your emergency? / Sprint HTC Evo: Hi, I just murdered the iPhone.

   All men were not created equal, look around more often

   9 out of 10 men smell their finger after scratching their nuts

   I'm proud to be an infidel

   There must be something behind the power outage at the super dome, may be stop the momentum??

   ‎1st half take...my grandma could've defended better than the 49ers!

   Hey Obaman & other Liberal Dems The race card has become tired tattered and faded. Time to fabricate a new strategy.

   Love doesn't cost a thing... except tears, a broken heart, wasted time, and half ur sh!t.

   Liberal = hypocrite. YOU: must do as I say ME: must do what feels good

   Obama just announced his NEW plan! He is going to vacation in Martha's Vineyard

   Did Obama take ever take a economics class? Oh I'm sorry his school records are sealed too!