Anonunknown Funny Status Messages

   My wife asked me if I wanted to go on a date for Valentine's, so I asked her with who and do I know her...................then the trouble started.

   You ever look at someone and think that there should've been "one child left behind"?

   Its finally Friday! Felt like it took a week to get here!!

   I like to zumba but usually its only because I'm either trying to put on my socks, tie my shoes, or put on my underwear!

   I guess tomorrow they're going to change the little guy's name to Punxsutawney Popsicle.

   I'm individually wrapped for freshness, that's why I get dressed in the mornings!!

   So I guess its true: once you go black...........

   i must be old school, I prefer 720p to 1080p.

   Welcome to " Its Friday, b!tch3s!" You may place your attitudes in a laid back or don't give a phock position, underwear is optional, and as always, thank you for joining us on this weekend adventure!!

   Well fellas another one bit the dust.......that's right he got married! Let us pray for him........................May GOD protect him, and that his wife will have mercy on his soul! And friend, I think it's time to start tweaking the whole " I, (name), a

   Just as I suspected! Monday suxs!!!!

   oh good, my Obama bucks are still good!

   Breaking news: Colorado will soon be re-named Little Amsterdam and will host Cheech and Chong Headquarters. Also there will be a state Bong: Chong's Bongs! that is all!

   Don't you hate when you rush to the bathroom and the lady in the next stall won't share the TP?!?!?!