@jhennezzey Funny Status Messages
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The awesome moment when you're telling a lie and your best friend notices and joins you

Hell hath no fury like a woman slightly inconvenienced.

I use to be good at math, until they added the alphabet

Have you noticed that the "&" symbol looks like a guy dragging his ass across the floor?

Calories: Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little tighter each
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