@daddybullfrog1 Funny Status Messages

   The Nut I busted yesterday was so good it's still on my mind today at work. I'm totally having Pistachios again tonight

   Me and a friend have been texting "LOL" back and forth for the last 10 min. Neither 1 of us have anything else to say but don't want to be the rude one not to text back!

   Does any1 else find it wierd that in the movie "twilight new moon" there are 4 boys running around in the woods shirtless together?!

   I can't believe I paid $6 for diahrea thanks Taco Bell!

   I love you in a "leave me alone" kinda way!

   If I wanted to listen to someone bi!ch, complain and act like there better than everyone else I'd listen to RAP music

   Watched Justin Beiber preform tonight on Amercan Idol and realized there is one thing worse than eternal hell....being Justin Beiber's background singer!

   Last night I said to the wife let's get rated R. So I pulled down my pants and she cussed and punched me in the face.

   It's illegal to text and drive, but it's not against the law to work on ur laptop whilest driving. Thanks policeman for making that clear.

   Just bought a "Flux Capacitor" off eBay!

   Angelina Jolie is the prettiest ugly chick I've ever seen!

   I just found out there is an "acceptable" amount of radioactive iodine in water.

   With "Lost" and "American Idol" finished what am I supposed to do with my life, I guess I'll go enjoy that hot orange thing in the sky!

   Even God hates BP! Lightning struck the tanker today and started a fire!

   I must have ordered the "Johnny Cash" at Taco Bell cuz now I'm experiencing a "Ring of Fire" in the bathroom!

   Lawrence Taylor quote: "I'm not a rapist but I did stay at a holiday inn express last night"

   Thx Burger King breakfast for letting me experience Prison Food!

   Just watched "fourth kind", I think I need to go to church!

   In retaliation for the genocide of their people the Indians today magnificently beat the Cowboys in a game of football! All is even!

   I don't know what to say, so I'll just say what's in my heart... Baboom, Baboom, Baboom.