DYLAN BOSCH Funny Status Messages

   Restaurants, please stop trying to get clever with your restroom signs. I have a very small bladder."

   Nobody goes to that Bar anymore. It's too crowded... wait, what, nevermind, let's go!"

   really getting sick of all these so-called "Twilight" Rip-off shows or shows that had the vampire idea but realised it after the series. How's come when "Avatar" came out. they didn't bring back the Smurfs?"

   if Winter was alive, I would hunt it down and kill it..."

   Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser!

   I imagine love is like hearing your favorite song for the first time. Then Listening to it over and over again till you hate that song."

   why don't they just make a James Bond Television Series? Because if you think about it, there's already enough movies to make one season."

   Trust me.. You DO NOT want to see how a Sausage Fest is Made!"

   Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.

   some kid told me that my "Picture is under Idiot in the Dictionary" I put on a medieval face and replied "It's better then the obituary!!"

   remembering how when he was young and only kiss on the lips was a big deal, now a days it's like let's cut the bullsh*t let's have sexy time."

   Heigh ho! Heigh ho! It's Off to the Bar I go.."

   "I Hate or Can't Stand Drama" is translation for "I'm gonna be the first one to cause all the Drama Tonight, just thought I would give you the heads up!"

   Recipe for disaster: When your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad..."

   one of you people has stolen my brain, and I want it back raight naow bfoor tinghs dtt ny wurs

   I Never understood why people watch porn together while having sex. If I have porn then what the hell do I need with another person?"

   I just realised Chewbacca carries a Purse!"

   Hey Karma, I got a list of people you missed."

   Being Single on Valentine's Day just reminds how pathetic some people are, and how awesome I still am for Being Single on Valentine's Day."

   if I mad 9.9 million dollars a year,.. a b*tch wouldn't be my problem either."