Abraham lincoln Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Abraham lincoln': View All Messages
Page: 9 of 12

   messageicon I was thinking of you today! I also threw up in my mouth a little, but it just might be a coincidence!!!
←Rate | 07-15-2012 09:14 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I ignored your Facebook Friend Request only because there isn't a ''Oh Hell No!'' Button!!!
←Rate | 07-14-2012 08:48 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day! Teach a man to fish and he will go out and purchase expensive fishing gear, stupid looking clothes,a sports utility vehicle,travel 1000 miles to a lake,to stand waist high to catch 2 fish!
←Rate | 07-14-2012 08:45 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll et the same underage 14yr old Chinese worker who made the United States Olympic uniforms is the same 14yr old that beats us to win the Gold Medal in Gymnastics!!!
←Rate | 07-14-2012 08:24 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mic Jagger'snew book says he slept with 4,000 women!..........Well 3,999 if you subtract David Bowie!!!
←Rate | 07-13-2012 11:20 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Steven Tyler is quitting American Idol after two seasons! I sure am going to miss that old lady!!!
←Rate | 07-13-2012 06:14 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am an Illegal! I came to take your job. But you don't have one to take!!!
←Rate | 07-12-2012 13:45 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey I found your nose! It was in everyone elses business again!!!
←Rate | 07-12-2012 11:05 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon There isn't enough make-up in the world to cover-up crazy!!!
←Rate | 07-12-2012 09:49 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bruce Willis is working on the 5th Die Hard movie! They should call this one ''Just kill me already!!!''
←Rate | 07-11-2012 09:06 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I took my Cat and her six kittens to the Vet to get them spayed and neutered! The Vet asked ''Is the momma cat friendly?'' I said ''Well....Duh, How do you think we got in this mess in the first place!!!''
←Rate | 07-08-2012 09:53 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I enjoy a glass of Wine each night for it's health benefits! The rest of the bottle is for my flawless dance moves, and to make you look more appealling!
←Rate | 07-08-2012 09:49 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon My parents accused me of being a liar today! All I said was ''Santa Claus'' ''Easter Bunny'' '' Tooth Fairy'' and walked away. Shut them Up!!!
←Rate | 07-07-2012 11:57 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon There needs to be a phone-line to Heaven.....for the one's we miss!!!
←Rate | 07-07-2012 10:31 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Neighbor mows his lawn every Sunday morning at 7:00am sharp! So tonight I'm listing his mower for sale on Craigslist at 11:00pm for only $5.00. That should keep his phone ringing most of the night!..........(sleeping in tomorrow!)
←Rate | 07-07-2012 09:19 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Got a Straw! ...Because you ''Suck!''
←Rate | 07-07-2012 08:41 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today is International Kissing Day!.....Who wants one?...Wait, let me put my teeth in First!!!
←Rate | 07-06-2012 11:17 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Friday is my Second Favorite ''F'' Word!!!
←Rate | 07-06-2012 10:55 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had formed an opinion of this Lazy Guy, and then I thought, until I have walked a mile in his shoes, so I did! Now I know he's Lazy and has Athlete's Foot!!!
←Rate | 07-06-2012 10:24 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Had one too many lastnight! Woke up to my neighbor mowing his lawn! .....I don't care, I am not moving! He's just going to have to mow around me!!!
←Rate | 07-06-2012 09:19 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left