Marshall the Great Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon 2 eyes to see... 2 ears to hear... 2 hands to hold... 2 legs to walk... but 1 heart? Because the other was given to someone else... for us to find.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 07:13 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thoughts lead to words... Words lead to actions... Actions build your character... Your character determines your destiny.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 07:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 07:23 by Marshall the Great Comments (6)  


   messageicon Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 07:29 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 07:48 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon I'm thinking of removing all the keys off my friend's keyboard and replacing them in a random order.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 08:19 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people rake leaves, others blow them. I prefer the flamethrower, it's fun for the whole neighborhood.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 13:02 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 13:04 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm beginning to suspect the only reason I'm not hungover is because I'm still drunk.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 13:09 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook is perfect for me. It's the c0cktail party where you don't have to wait your turn to speak.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 13:53 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm going back to traffic school to get my Masters.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 14:12 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women say they love a man in uniform but when I go clubbing in my McDonalds outfit none of them will even talk to me.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 14:24 by Marshall the Great Comments (2)  


   messageicon Please don't ever change! I always want to be better than you.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 14:30 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd let you talk more, but you're not as interesting as I am.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 14:38 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may write me down in history with your bitter, twisted lies... You may trod me in the very dirt... But still, like the dust, I'll rise!
←Rate | 06-05-2010 11:41 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a new philosophy to foster peace and harmony in the universe: GIVE ME WHAT I WANT WHEN I WANT IT.
←Rate | 06-05-2010 12:52 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've decided that, instead of being a good example, I'll be a warning.
←Rate | 06-05-2010 12:59 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I took your survey, sent you a round, tended your garden, poked you, hugged you, and sent you 10 useless gifts. It's hard being a Facebook friend.
←Rate | 06-05-2010 13:00 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I read the rules and decided they are stupid so I will be making my own from now on.
←Rate | 06-05-2010 13:01 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know where children get their energy... they drain it from their parents!
←Rate | 06-05-2010 13:05 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  




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