Abraham Lincoln Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon It's all fun and games til you lose your wifi..........ok, wife!
←Rate | 07-24-2012 10:01 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't trust joggers! It's just a little too coincidental that they are the ones that find all the dead bodies!!!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 02:37 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon The first person that started hiccuping must have been scared to death!
←Rate | 08-07-2012 00:56 by Abraham lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's not flirting it's being extra nice to someone extra attractive!
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:37 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry I was talking while you were interupting!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 13:09 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon How many divorced men does it atke to change a light bulb?......No one knows they never keep the house!
←Rate | 08-07-2012 12:20 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon If sex beteen three people is called a threesome, and between two people a twosome, I now understand why people call you handsome!!!
←Rate | 07-18-2012 22:22 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everyone seems Normal until you get to know them!!!
←Rate | 07-23-2012 07:56 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have yet to be intimidated by fancy wine lists thanks to my vast knowledge of fancy wines and my eeny, meeny, miny moe system!!!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 02:40 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man Rule #6......Men's Olympic Swimming events are the ''Only'' I repeat ''Only'' time speedo's are allowed!!!
←Rate | 07-29-2012 02:42 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before you judge me.......nmake sure you're perfect!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 13:09 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon No matter how old you are, how stiff, how brittle,you can always still put your foot in your mouth!!!
←Rate | 07-22-2012 09:59 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon While you are enjoying your BBQ's, cookouts, and family get togethers! Please remember what this Independence Day truly represents! Happy Birthday America! Still the greatest Country in the World!!
←Rate | 07-04-2012 08:22 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (2)  


   messageicon Roses are Red! The Sun is Gold!....Now get on your knee's and do as you're told!!!
←Rate | 07-17-2012 11:33 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1 tequila, 2 tequila,s 3 tequiklas, 4 teuiqlas, 5 teiuqlsd, 6 teiqulkss, 7 eteiqlas, 8 treqiklasl, 9 travquikas, 10 trewquwtss
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:39 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon A paper boy said to a customer ''Mr Smith, I wish I had 20 customers like you!'' ''Wow thats ice to hear considering I never tip and always pay late.'' said Smith The paper boy said ''I know, that's why I'd like 20 customers like you, I have 150 right now
←Rate | 07-23-2012 08:11 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I didn't post this status somebody else made it happen!!!
←Rate | 07-24-2012 09:18 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today is International Kissing Day!.....Who wants one?...Wait, let me put my teeth in First!!!
←Rate | 07-06-2012 11:17 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before ou diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure you are not in fact surrounded by a$$holes!!!
←Rate | 07-22-2012 13:46 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Avoid arguements about the toilet seat.........use the sink!!!
←Rate | 07-23-2012 07:55 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


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