Abraham Lincoln Funny Status Messages

   I wonder how long it takes a girrafe to vomit!

   The harder you work, the luckier you get!!!...........Make it happen for yourself!

   A Blonde was asked what her password was and she said ''MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento''....When asked why such a long password she replied ''Well Hello! It has 8 characters and at least one Capital!!''

   Chick-fil-a has been taking alot of heat for it's stance against Same Sex Marriage! To show they are progreesing with trhe times,they I'll be releasing a new food item today. The ''Chick on Chick'' Sandwich!

   What if when we die the light we see at the end of the tunnel is just us being pushed out of another V@gina!!!

   On our Birthday! America as a Nation needs desperately to realize that if we do not again regain the lead in Technology and Education, we will continue to bury our heads in the sands of Afghanistan, Iraq, and Pakistan!!!

   I just bought a television! It's amazing the price difference between a 47 inch T.V. and a 50 inch T.V. is a couple hundred dollars! In real life for an extra 3 inches I would pay thousands!!!

   First, Love Yourself!..........Everyone Else, get in line!!!

   I'll et the same underage 14yr old Chinese worker who made the United States Olympic uniforms is the same 14yr old that beats us to win the Gold Medal in Gymnastics!!!

   Dude, she has a Boyfriend! So, soccer has a goalie doesn't mean you can't still score!

   Music is my Escape from all the Bullsh!t in Life!!!

   Penn State.....There's always Academics!

   Listen I'm not an alcoholic, they go to meetings...I'm a drunk we go to parties!

   If they played it would be the 1992 ''Dream Team'' vs.2012 ''Keep Dreamin Team''

   The only people mad at you for speaking the truth! Are those living a lie!!!

   As you Mature, you learn that you cannot make someone love you!.....All you can do is Stalk them and hope they panic and give in!!!

   Olympian's earn their medals every 4yrs........In Afghanistan our servicemen earn their medals every day!!!

   It's all fun and games til you lose your wifi..........ok, wife!

   I don't trust joggers! It's just a little too coincidental that they are the ones that find all the dead bodies!!!

   The first person that started hiccuping must have been scared to death!