L Funny Status Messages

   I ain't talking about Floyd when I say I love May weather.

   Today's the perfect day for ribs and Salsa music.

   Too many Hood guys not enough Good guys.

   If there's left overs... You can't cook.

   She's not my girl but I get her to smile

   Thanks to George Zimmerman The great seal of Florida is now burned into my Plasma.

   Excuse me Mr Zimmerman I know this isn't the right time but umm.. Who is that chick that sits behind you to the left?!!

   "F hash tags and retweets, 140 characters in these streets"

   I'm sweating worse than Patrick Ewing

   Eat right, exercise, die anyway.

   I love when I post a status and someone copy's and pastes its and I get 4 thousand likes and they get two.

   I just threw my clothes away and bought my garbage to the laundry mat

   God never gives you anything you can't handle and apparently he thinks I can handle a hell of alot.

   Who needs the NFL Ticket when you have Facebook?

   Cosby Show Fact: Sandra and Elvans Children were named after Winnie and Nelson Mandela. #RIP

   Starting the year off right!! Fried chicken, French fries more fried chicken and a fried gym membership.

   I need a full body the selfie movement ain't doin it for me lady's

   I can't wait for all the life long residents in NY to see snow for the first time.

   Twitter is the gym membership of the internet

   Pro tip: the kids run around a little longer of you forget to hide the eggs