@OMFG_Rel8able Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Gas prices = robbery without a gun!
←Rate | 12-05-2011 13:03 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to slowly go down on you and tease you. Then rise up and fxck you hard. Sincerely, Gas Prices
←Rate | 12-06-2011 18:55 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon getting ready to give her sheets some ass & her pillow some head ...good night everybody
←Rate | 12-08-2011 23:32 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't be unhappy if your dreams never come true -- just be thankful your nightmares don't.
←Rate | 12-11-2011 23:10 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I refuse to go bungee jumping...I came into this world because of a broken rubber, I'm not leaving because of one!!
←Rate | 12-11-2011 23:13 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon It wasn't my fault I got drunk!!! I was thirsty ;) x
←Rate | 12-11-2011 23:15 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I won't be impressed with technology until I can download money ;)
←Rate | 12-13-2011 21:57 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Go down a water slide while it isn't wet and then you'll understand why foreplay is so important
←Rate | 12-13-2011 22:12 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon That moment of happiness when you find out that everyone hates the same person you hate
←Rate | 12-13-2011 22:17 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Daddy tell me a bedtime story!" "Sure honey. Once upon a time, a little girl wouldn't go to bed. Then she died.
←Rate | 12-14-2011 19:16 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're drunk when you can speak fluent Ozzy Osbourne
←Rate | 12-14-2011 19:17 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Internet Issues: Open a new tab & forget why.
←Rate | 12-14-2011 19:51 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.
←Rate | 12-14-2011 20:05 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good new and bad news. Bad news: No good news. Good news: No bad news.
←Rate | 12-26-2011 20:09 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon We blame society, but we are society..
←Rate | 12-29-2011 00:02 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents. The second half will be ruined by our children.
←Rate | 12-29-2011 00:07 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when I see the skinniest people at the gym, Why are you there, YOU WON ALREADY!
←Rate | 12-31-2011 00:54 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what's your plan?
←Rate | 01-02-2012 20:38 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm a lazy ass texter, unless you're cute, or I like you.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 19:51 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon The bipolar emoticon —> :):
←Rate | 01-03-2012 20:30 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  




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