StonerDudee Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon 10 year old girls are crying because they broke up with their boyfriend. When I was 10 I cried because I missed the morning cartoons.
←Rate | 09-08-2013 18:42 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't help being lazy. It walks in the family.
←Rate | 03-31-2013 19:46 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kanye West must feel very conflicted right now. He's excited Kim is pregnant, but deep down he knows Beyonce had the best baby of all time.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 16:03 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nice try Jehovah's Witnesses but dressing up like cops and telling me you have a warrant is not going to get me to open my door.
←Rate | 05-22-2014 13:58 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook needs a 'Wow that's the dumbest f*cking thing I've ever heard, you should be punched in the throat' button.
←Rate | 05-27-2013 12:56 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate jokes that rely on visual imagery. I've had it right up to here with them.
←Rate | 07-08-2014 13:20 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship.
←Rate | 06-16-2012 17:19 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's hilarious when textbooks try too hard at being racially diverse. "Brad, Latisha, Pablo and Kwan were doing a math problem..."
←Rate | 08-22-2013 19:47 by StonerDudee Comments (2)  


   messageicon That "speaking to another human being" feature on my phone has got to be my least favorite feature.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 10:11 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon You are on the list of the many things I would do for a Klondike bar.
←Rate | 08-16-2015 19:49 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can not be held responsible for what my face does when you talk.
←Rate | 07-09-2015 02:40 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The older I get the more I realise there are no grown ups and nobody knows what the f*ck they're doing.
←Rate | 05-08-2015 01:44 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The difference between "I do" and "Do me" is the happily ever after part.
←Rate | 10-20-2012 12:26 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon How does a woman carry a child in her stomach for 9 months, go through all the pain, hold it in her arms, and end up calling it laquisha
←Rate | 02-04-2014 15:11 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lance Armstrong falls from grace and suddenly it's "ok" to make jokes about losing a testicle to cancer. Hope you jerks are having a ball.
←Rate | 01-18-2013 18:03 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I learned all my dance moves from the paternity test episodes of Maury.
←Rate | 05-29-2014 18:53 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Karma is when you throw a banana in Mario Kart and you end up slipping on it.
←Rate | 10-22-2012 16:53 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon All my life I've wanted to learn to juggle. I just never had the balls to do it.
←Rate | 07-27-2012 12:36 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The guys at Home Depot must take classes to know exactly what I meant by "the little thing next to that one piece with the round thing."
←Rate | 10-01-2013 11:14 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are they called One Direction? Looks to me like they go both ways.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 20:33 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  




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