@OMFG_Rel8able Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Oh so now I'm invisible to you? That's cool. I've always wanted a superpower.
←Rate | 01-08-2012 20:25 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Good new and bad news. Bad news: No good news. Good news: No bad news.
←Rate | 12-26-2011 20:09 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Emergency call: "911, What is your emergency?" "Two girls are fighting over me!" "So what's the problem sir?" "The ugly one is winning..."
←Rate | 02-06-2012 00:44 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Definition of bravery: Trying to fart when you have diarrhea.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 16:13 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon WHERE YOUR PEN GOES WHEN YOU DROP IT 3% right where you dropped it 5% 10 feet away from you 92% into another dimension never to be seen again.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 15:09 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon "Is there gonna be food?" "Yup!" "Ok I'm on my way"
←Rate | 10-22-2011 14:21 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon When Someone Asks For Candy That I'm Eating, I Give Them The Flavor I Don't Like
←Rate | 10-22-2011 15:04 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon When FB stalking someone & I find out their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
←Rate | 01-08-2012 20:15 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Appreciate the little things. Hug a midget
←Rate | 04-18-2012 21:28 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon I got a dig bick. You this read wrong. You that read wrong too. And too that.
←Rate | 01-22-2012 23:24 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm not shy, I'm holding back my awesomeness, so I don't intimidate you ;P
←Rate | 10-26-2011 16:28 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear anyone who can finish an eraser, chapstick, and a pencil, without losing it: You're my idol!
←Rate | 11-11-2011 00:33 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon My manners disappear the more I have to repeat something. "Can you pass me the pen? The pen, can you pass it? Hello? GIVE ME THE F**KING PEN!!!"
←Rate | 11-03-2011 20:16 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Nothing says "I'm a fat b@stard" like wearing a T-shirt in a swimming pool.....
←Rate | 11-03-2011 20:29 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon That yellow shirt looks good on you... It really brings out the color in your teeth.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 23:23 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon ...Its all fun and games..until you get stuck on a level of candy crush!!!
←Rate | 11-14-2013 14:24 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Friend: Whatcha eating? Me: alphabet soup. Friend: looks like spaghetti to me. Me: It's in Arabic
←Rate | 11-13-2011 22:40 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon Two types of people that annoy me: Drunk people when I'm sober. Sober people when I'm drunk.
←Rate | 04-18-2012 21:01 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon At my funeral when they're lowering me into the ground I demand they play "Drop it like its hot"!!!
←Rate | 06-09-2012 14:02 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

   messageicon “Can I use your phone to call my mom?” “Yeah, just hit redial…
←Rate | 01-20-2012 23:55 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  

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