Abraham Lincoln Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If I didn't have internet I'd be asleep 4hrs earlier every night!
←Rate | 08-07-2012 00:56 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon They should blast the Oscar Meyer Weiner Song non-stop into Jerry Sandusky's cell for the 400yrs he's in there!!!
←Rate | 06-25-2012 13:41 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let me in, Let me in, Let me in! I need to go back out again!----My Dog!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 13:10 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I decorated my bedroom to look like a classroom so I can fall asleep faster!
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:37 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dogs don't care if Bacon is crispy or not!
←Rate | 08-01-2012 09:45 by Abraham lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey I found your nose! It was in everyone elses business again!!!
←Rate | 07-12-2012 11:05 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Relax........Let's get back to the important things in life! Like stealing eachothers status!
←Rate | 07-24-2012 12:12 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon it poontang or puddingtang?.....I need to know real fast this English Composition is due today!!!
←Rate | 07-25-2012 08:08 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon During the opening Olympic ceramony I thought the Chinese uniforms looked pretty good!....And the ones worn by the Chinese team weren't too bad either!!!
←Rate | 07-29-2012 02:47 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon ''Mommy does Barbie come with Ken?'' ......''No sweetheart she comes with G.I.Joe, she just fakes it with Ken!!!''
←Rate | 07-19-2012 09:52 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you are a kid, ''I'm going to tell your mom!'' is the scariest sentence ever!!!
←Rate | 06-25-2012 12:17 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I stop my car for you to walk across the street, I better see some hustle out of you! Knee's to chest b!tch , knee's to chest!!!
←Rate | 07-23-2012 07:15 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon At a Hotal a Man accidentally bumps into a Woman beside him and as he does his elbow touches her Brea$t. The man says ''Ma'am if your heart is as soft as your brea$t I know you'll forgive me!'' Her ''If your Pen!$ is as hard as your elbow I'm in room 436
←Rate | 07-25-2012 09:07 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not Crazy, I'm just a sane person trapped in the body of a Lunatic!!!
←Rate | 06-26-2012 12:42 by Abraham lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon 16 and a Olympian > 16 and Pregnent
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:56 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my Boobs sag any more people are going to think they are nuts!
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:40 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are just like cartons of Orange Juice! It's not the size or shape that matters. Or even how sweet the juice is. It's getting those Fking flaps open!!!
←Rate | 07-19-2012 08:37 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's no better feeling than proving someone wrong!
←Rate | 07-31-2012 13:09 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want to be successful in life just tell yourself this each morning ''I am smart. intelligent, qualified. now if a job wuld just come available I'll get it!!!''
←Rate | 07-27-2012 14:01 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (1)  


   messageicon Kris Humphries of the Nets signed a 2yr $24 Million Dollar contract! Not bad considering the Nets are owned by Jay-Z, who's bestfriend is Kanye West, who is banging Humphries ex-wife!!!
←Rate | 07-18-2012 07:42 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  




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