Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5256 of 6370
It's not that I hate you, it's just.. well i'll put it this way.. if you were on fire & I had water, I'd drink i
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01-17-2011 23:17
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♪♫♫♪Accept the Poke. THAT'S IT. Then Poke me back, Game over. Then I can Poke you, then Poke me back. And were done. That's it, That's all I want. Then I'll Poke you again, and you Poke me back. Poke Me Back♫♪♫♫♪♪♪♫♪♫
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01-17-2011 22:55 by Rachael
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pretty sure I just ate a record setting amount of Rice Krispies!
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01-17-2011 22:50 by Hot Tea
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My hats off to the Jets. They made Tom Brady look like Greg Brady.
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01-17-2011 22:46
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My other facebook wall has a scenic view.
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01-17-2011 21:05
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just won the Golden Globe for "Best status post, musical or comedy".
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01-17-2011 20:58
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wants to go the next NHL Winter Classic and sneak onto the ice with a fishing pole and a folding chair. Just for laughs.
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01-17-2011 20:34
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Next person that asks me "Is it cold out?" after I walk inside with my winter coat on, gloves, hot and a red face is going to get thrown outside in the snow and locked out.
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01-17-2011 20:17
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my next license plate: POKE ME
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01-17-2011 20:15
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my field of dreams would be a football field built in a field barley made into beer to serve free of charge at the games.
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01-17-2011 20:10
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wonders how love potions 1-8 worked out.
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01-17-2011 20:07
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Hickies in junior high = Sweet! Hickies in your 30s = Gross
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01-17-2011 20:06
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been poked more times than a fireplace this month.
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01-17-2011 20:04
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george washington owned a dodge charger---wikipedia
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01-17-2011 20:02
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Putting kids to bed is a little like playing WHACK-A-MOLE.
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01-17-2011 19:51
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watching Jersey Shore...Are my eyes supposed to bleed?
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01-17-2011 19:37
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real eyes realize real lies
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01-17-2011 19:10
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Worst football performance by a Brady since Marcia.
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01-17-2011 18:47
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just because the shampoo bottle says strawberry dont means it taste like strawberries
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01-17-2011 18:45
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just like the rent, too damn high.