DYLAN BOSCH Funny Status Messages

   well, I was going to Google something.. but ended up playing the electric piano instead. Thanks Google."

   if I sneeze and you're sitting next to me, it is acceptable to bless me. If I sneeze and you're 50 feet across the room from me, no need to shout at me unless you're the pope."

   So many input boxes. Ever go to search for a girl on facebook and set her name as your status instead? Me either."

   During a particularly rough storm the other night, local weatherman advised getting into your bathtub, covering yourself with a heavy blanket and wearing a bicycle helmet. I am ONLY watching that channel's news from now on..."

   still wants to know if everybody's still attending my Huge Orgy Party held on December 21, 2012 at my place?"

   running around the house with a towel tied around his neck with only his boxers on and a Giant "S" written on his Chest Yelling "This Looks Like a Job for..."

   Somewhere, right now.. One of my Facebook friends is already drunk!"

   you never really realise how sexy a nerd, dork or tomboy can be until you see them in a Halloween Costume.."

   can't wait to see who's all going to be single on my facebook after the 4th of July!"

   I gotta get outta this funk, I've somehow lost my spunk. I'm not cheery, or happy, and I hate feeling crappy. Perhaps I should just get drunk!"

   This is one holiday where our full-blown alcoholism could possibly go undetected.. Happy St. Patty's Day!!"

   The first Monday night game in Detroit in almost 10 years and the Lions aren't even playing in it!"

   justin bieber is still alive :(

   Do you think the Man in the Yellow Hat mentions George on his Internet dating profile?"

   I have a cold. it makes my voice sound like a sexy pirate."

   I kissed a girl on the playground in the summer of '96. Maybe someday she'll find me and we'll hook up again. Who Knows, Until then I'll keep chasing brunettes with big boobies."

   Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been Doing Since 15

   whenever I see a guy that looks better then me, I immediately get intimadated that he's gonna take all the girls from me, but later I find out there not into girls. so, it all works out."

   Bummer: Just Found out that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle that came to my 6th Birthday was actually my Aunt!"

   Boys have to put forth real effort to get laid, while all girls have to do is stand bra-less in the wind."