@OMFG_Rel8able Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon What I learned from Movies: No matter how fast you run, a psychopath can catch up to you by walking slowly
←Rate | 01-22-2012 20:59 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Has discovered why losing weight when you are older is so difficult. The fat and your body have become such good friends that they don't wan to be separated.
←Rate | 01-22-2012 20:58 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Deny,Deny,Deny..If they aint got pictures,they aint got sh*t!
←Rate | 01-21-2012 18:00 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Can I use your phone to call my mom?” “Yeah, just hit redial…
←Rate | 01-20-2012 23:55 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon "You look happy. Let me see what I can do about that" - Life
←Rate | 01-20-2012 22:32 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a man at the beach yelling "Help, Shark, Help!" I just laughed, I knew that shark wasn't going to help him
←Rate | 01-20-2012 22:31 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon The single most suspicious thing you can do when someone walks into the room is to minimize your browser
←Rate | 01-19-2012 23:48 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lil Wayne = 5% black. 95% tattoos.!!
←Rate | 01-19-2012 23:42 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Let's talk dirty" ... "What DID YOU SAY?!" ... "I said it's 10:30...
←Rate | 01-19-2012 23:40 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I was stranded on a desert island & could only bring 1 thing, I would bring Dora. That b!tch has everything in her backpack
←Rate | 01-19-2012 23:32 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do people feel safe under blankets? It's not like a murderer will come in thinking “I'M GOING TO KILL.. Ah darn he's under a blanket”!!
←Rate | 01-19-2012 22:38 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some guy waved to me and then walked up and said, “Sorry, I thought you were someone else.” I said, “I am.”!!!
←Rate | 01-18-2012 00:26 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing in life is “fun for the whole family.”
←Rate | 01-17-2012 23:50 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon On a scale of 9 to 10, how would you rate me????
←Rate | 01-17-2012 23:39 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't think I've ever heard a car alarm go off for a legit reason..
←Rate | 01-17-2012 23:32 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon EGSG «—- Scrambled eggs
←Rate | 01-17-2012 23:31 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when I'm eating cereal and the last 5 pieces are like "Try n' catch me bro!"
←Rate | 01-17-2012 22:55 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon ~• << Picture of me when I was younger, I was so cute. :D
←Rate | 01-17-2012 00:10 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say, “keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” The problem is, nowadays you can't tell them apart.
←Rate | 01-11-2012 12:28 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon My head says, “Go to the gym.” but my heart says, “stay on the internet forever and eat!”!
←Rate | 01-11-2012 12:27 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  




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