Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
Page: 5 of 6012

   messageicon I think we all need to be on the same page on this: are we telling kids that the Easter Bunny died of Corona Virus or that Carole Baskin killed him?
←Rate | 04-07-2020 07:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anyone else feel the love in here?
←Rate | 04-07-2020 07:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your blow up dolls nose starts running, she’s not sick she’s full.
←Rate | 04-07-2020 06:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I say that because I'm hoping for it.
←Rate | 04-07-2020 02:24 by AnonymousSource Comments (0)  


   messageicon Trump will be re-elected.
←Rate | 04-07-2020 01:44 by AnonymousSource Comments (1)  


   messageicon Lets send the coronavirus tiger to Carole Baskin
←Rate | 04-06-2020 20:15 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon True Christian values below. Wish death to everyone who disagrees with you. No wonder you people think Trump is holier than the Pope.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 20:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Make that #10,002. Let his boyfriend get it too.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 19:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon To the below: Spoken like a true blue Christian, eh? You must make God so proud.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 18:51 Comments (1)  


   messageicon We are the knights who say ‘Ni!
←Rate | 04-06-2020 17:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Been on a new diet that seems to be working for me called "I better not eat too much as I'm trying to conserve what little toilet paper I have the hoards didn't get" diet.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 15:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Corvidiot: Pronounced - Cor-v-idiot. Meaning - Someone who is a coronavirus incredibly stupid. Exceple 1 - Dude! Are you really go out to get coffee with friends? Exemple 1 - Look at the dude with 300 rolls of of toilet paper in his shopping!
←Rate | 04-06-2020 15:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Aswe end week 2 of the lockdown, I wonder if OsamaBinLadin stuck in his house with 3 wives n kids decided to call in those Navy Seal himself
←Rate | 04-06-2020 09:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm convinced that Florida ain't afraid of nothing....except flying roaches
←Rate | 04-06-2020 09:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon there wasn't a coronavirus until you mofos started making those brooms stand up by themselves
←Rate | 04-06-2020 09:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not only are parents finding out their kids can't read, the kids are finding out that their parents can't read either during this quarantine
←Rate | 04-06-2020 09:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to lose weight but I don’t want to get caught up in one of those eat right and exercise scams
←Rate | 04-06-2020 08:58 by Rickster Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just thought I'd point out that if you're going around to different friends houses to make "Social Distancing" videos with you're missing the point.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 08:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since the medica frowns on using the term "Chinese virus" or "Kung Flu", please use the following instead: Wuhan Weezer, Boomer Doomer, or the Holocough.
←Rate | 04-06-2020 00:17 by Gripenfelter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since soap kills COVID 19, have you guys tried just eating Tide Pods again?
←Rate | 04-06-2020 00:14 by Gripenfelter Comments (0)  




Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left