KISSTOPHER Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, And they're like "It wasn't that hard."
←Rate | 03-11-2012 22:59 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Parents: Where are you going at this time of the night all dressed up like a slut? Daughter: To the bathroom, I need a new Facebook picture.
←Rate | 02-21-2012 12:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear woman who likes to bring her friends along on our first date. You are simply giving me more options just in case I am not feeling you.
←Rate | 04-15-2012 06:29 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've been knocking for ten minutes. Don't people answer their bathroom windows anymore?
←Rate | 10-15-2011 02:45 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon That thing where hypnotists snap their fingers and people fall asleep? Do they make that for kids?
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:48 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pregnant women look so happy. It's like they don't even know what's going to happen.
←Rate | 09-11-2012 15:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't get out of bed, it's a trap.
←Rate | 02-01-2013 08:13 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I need new haters. The old ones are starting to like me.
←Rate | 12-22-2011 15:14 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don’t tell your girlfriend she’s beautiful everyday, 614 guys on Facebook who haven’t had sex or even been on a date in 9 years will.
←Rate | 05-15-2013 15:02 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I miss being in a relationship. Could 1 of you girls come over here and yell at me, treat me like shi t and not sleep with me? It might help.
←Rate | 02-28-2013 08:29 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's okay to laugh during sex, just don't point.
←Rate | 03-12-2012 15:07 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe the people that say money can't buy happiness are just buying the wrong stuff?
←Rate | 05-04-2011 02:13 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon High Heels are a man's invention to make it harder for a woman to run away.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 02:55 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon The older the Facebook post, the creepier your "like" becomes.
←Rate | 01-20-2012 12:43 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear London Rioters: There is a big damn difference between, rioting for Freedom, and rioting for Free Stuff.
←Rate | 08-13-2011 09:00 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't want to marry me, why did you sit next to me on this bus?
←Rate | 09-29-2012 07:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when people need constant re-assurance. You know what I mean?
←Rate | 02-18-2012 12:08 by Kisstopher Comments (1)  


   messageicon Don't piss me off and then tell me to calm down. That's just like stabbing someone and then asking them not to bleed.
←Rate | 07-12-2011 10:20 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its amazing how many bad decisions can be justified or explained away by just saying, "I was drunk" or "I was in love"
←Rate | 01-26-2012 12:45 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Chicken I don't get why you r so popular 4 crossing the road ... Yours Sincerely The cow that jumped over the Möön
←Rate | 01-25-2012 11:06 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  



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