FADOLO Funny Status Messages

   Who would have thought - even our death is manufactured in China

   Silly hairdresser, always puts my cape on backwards.

   "My phone's about to die." -Me, 30 seconds into every phone call.

   Not entirely sure what a "propriate" is, but apparently I'm in it.

   That moment of epic sadness when you shut down the computer and then you realize that you need it again.

   The only thing more stressful than a blind date is meeting a new drug dealer for the first time.

   Ladies, if you love a man, set him free. If he comes back he will be yours forever. If he doesn't, the new chick probably does anil.

   Ladies, easy way to tell if a guy is married? Look into his eyes, if there is any sign of life left, he's single.

   Independent women throw your hands in the air!!!! Whooooooo! Ok now put your hands down and go do some dishes.

   Waking up for work :(-_-) .. Waking up on a saturday: \( 'O' )/

   I got arrested for punching this guy at a new years eve party..... when you here an arab counting down from ten your instincs kick in.

   Cop cars should play the jaws theme song

   | ( • )( • ) | Spongebob / ( • )( • ) \ Patrick ( (•)(•) ) Squidward | (•) | Plankton |•||•| Mr. Krabs

   hey hun!!!! The number of "followers" you have does not make you better than anyone else. Hitler had millions, Jesus had 12.

   Highways need 4 lanes per side. A Nascar wannabe, a normal driver, an old people who drive 30 in a 70 and a where the hell am I lane.

   There's nothing like shaving off your beard to remind everybody why your face needed a beard

   BABY MAMA has replaced the word "WIFE"

   Don’t send me the 1 pic you liked lemme see the hundred you didn’t like

   I just sneezed on my phone and it made little rainbow sparkles all over the screen. I'm pretty sure that makes me a Wizard.

   I've just bought a 3D Kindle. Or a book as I like to call it.