Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Maybe when the stuff was going down at the Capitol on Wednesday, the Government should have sent in Social Workers instead of the police.

   There are three sides to every argument: Your side, the other person's side, and the correct side.

   I lost my watch at a party once.An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was sexually harassing some woman at that party.Infuriated, I immediately went over,punched him in the face and broke his nose.No one does that to a woman,not on my watch

   I'm just thankful that the trump supporters didn't do anything really stupid, like kneel at a football game.

   I still can't believe some people's survival instincts told them to grab toilet paper.

   While walking outside a random lady walks up to me. Her: No mask? Me: No underwear either.

   Big game at the Capitol - Patriots vs the Stealers.

   Remember when our biggest fear in 2019 was lettuce?

   Aides from inside the White House are saying that Trump seems verydespondent today. Even a hand-job from his daughter did not seem to cheer him up this morning.

   You know, for a traitor to God and Country, Kaleigh Mceanany is kinda hot.

   I'd like to cancel my subscription to 2021. I've experienced the 7-Day Free Trial and I'm not interested.

   If I post something that you don’t like, just ignore it like you ignore the corruption of the government.

   Well it was a solid 5 days. Here's to 2022! 🥂

   And just like that, the left support police officers.

   Once again. Today is a day of reflection. Don't say a word. Just sit here and fully take in the hypocrisy, double standards, privilege & unequal energies that truly go on in this country day in & day out. It's crystal clear.

   This $600 causing problems already. My cousin drove by here real slow. And I only owe him $8...tf

   Hope all of you who received a book from me for Christmas thoroughly enjoy them! Oh and don't forget they need to be back the library by the 30th.

   Wow, the hypocrisy is running DEEP AF right now! Wheres all my blue lives matter people at? Oh yeah, attacking the Capitol. My bad

   I celebrated 4/20 on 1/5 because I know how to reduce fractions.

   For Sale. Slightly used Christmas tree. Prefer to do socially distance exchange and will place in front of house for you pickup. Leave money in neighbor's mailbox.