mm Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Some guy asked me why scuba divers always fall backwards into the water. I told him if they fell forwards they would still be in the boat.
←Rate | 08-27-2021 16:37 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thanks to the words "dude", "bro", and "man", I haven't said my best friends name in 10 years.
←Rate | 08-18-2021 18:12 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's funny when a Athiest needs a prayer they will ask for one. But when a Christian asks for one, they will be the first to make fun.
←Rate | 08-17-2021 12:01 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon I enjoy walking in a convenience store and having the cashier ask if I got gas. “No…just a little indigestion!”
←Rate | 08-16-2021 19:55 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm glad McDonald's doesn't sell hotdogs. I'd feel really awkward ordering a McWeiner, and don't even get me started on Super Size.
←Rate | 06-24-2021 18:18 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon This summer everyone should wear sunscreen, so the person next to you won't get sunburned.
←Rate | 06-11-2021 12:54 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon They're called "Heated Seats" because "Rear Defroster" was already taken.
←Rate | 04-10-2021 09:03 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy MILK day...!
←Rate | 01-18-2021 09:09 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon All these people on my list, and not none of ya talking to me... This is kinda awkward. I feel weird now..
←Rate | 07-04-2020 21:26 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't stand little kids, I know I was once one. But seriously can't stand them...
←Rate | 01-12-2020 10:28 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon i got addicted to nicotine gum..now I smoke trying to kick the habbit...
←Rate | 01-30-2012 10:00 by mm Comments (0)  


   messageicon wishes Brett would just go away. Favre, Favre away.
←Rate | 01-25-2010 07:20 by mm Comments (0)  


   messageicon can't get this nicorette stuff lit.
←Rate | 01-13-2010 18:01 by mm Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jesus saves... He must shop at Wall*Mart...
←Rate | 08-01-2009 00:50 by MM Comments (0)  




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