MM Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I wish Facebook would notify me when people deleted me, that way I could like it...
←Rate | 02-15-2022 10:46 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon With all the discounted Valentine's candy that's available, I like to call February 15th "Loner Halloween."
←Rate | 02-15-2022 16:42 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives....
←Rate | 02-18-2022 16:21 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon There was another kidnapping at a local a school today, luckily the kid woke up!
←Rate | 02-18-2022 16:55 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do women always say they want a man with a stable job... What’s so glamorous about cleaning up after horses?
←Rate | 02-21-2022 16:17 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got to face the facts. My orange loser will never darken the doors of the white house ever again. Not even as a tourist.
←Rate | 02-22-2022 12:27 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon A wise man washes his hands after he pees. A wiser man doesn't pee on his hands...
←Rate | 03-10-2022 16:21 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Folks crying about $4 a gallon gas while in line for $6 coffee.
←Rate | 03-13-2022 10:40 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a problem with Kinect for X-Box... If I wanted to use my entire body to play sports... I would just play sports.
←Rate | 03-26-2022 17:25 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just because your p*ssy's wet doesn't t mean it's good. Trash bags leak too.
←Rate | 04-21-2022 13:16 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Need money to travel back to 1941 to give Joe Bidens dad a condom.
←Rate | 06-08-2022 16:27 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can't sell electric cars if gas is cheap. If you don't think that's part of the plan, you're not paying attention.
←Rate | 06-09-2022 14:30 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't let your Facebook balls get your real life teeth knocked out.
←Rate | 07-16-2022 10:42 by MM Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you. People are harder. Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.”
←Rate | 09-18-2022 17:00 by MM Comments (0)  



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