ef Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I don't care how the future pans out, any amazon delivery from now on is referred to as a drone strike.
←Rate | 12-04-2013 16:14 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Santa....I've been good for the last hour
←Rate | 12-24-2013 22:24 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every family has a relative that they would prefer to keep hidden during the Holidays. If you think your family doesn't have one...Trust me it is YOU!
←Rate | 12-15-2013 17:03 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Snow in Egypt! In the dessert! Global warming strikes again!....Al Gore refuses comment
←Rate | 12-13-2013 13:29 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Most meteorologists are men. That's why when they say you're going to get 8-12 inches of snow, you really only end up getting 4-6 inches.
←Rate | 12-08-2013 11:29 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kanye West compared being a rapper to BEING AT WAR ."This is like being a police officer or something or like war or something." "You're literally going out to do your job every day knowing that something could happen to you.".No Kanye being an idiot is!
←Rate | 12-09-2013 21:48 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever notice that the people with the most insecurities are the loudest?
←Rate | 12-04-2013 23:06 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon You kids complain about everthing.....You want to know how bad I had it? I'm so old the "Diaper Man" used to come to our house to take the sh#tty diapers away and bring back "clean ones" that really some other kid had sh it in!
←Rate | 11-30-2013 22:15 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay can we only go through one day of Mandela jokes instead of the 3 days of Paul Walker????? Thanks!
←Rate | 12-05-2013 22:27 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon I gave my wife a couple of credit cards and now my credit score is lower than the speed limit
←Rate | 12-05-2013 21:31 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dudes should not ''poke'' other Dudes on Facebook!
←Rate | 12-01-2013 21:50 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon What this generation of young men need to realize is that the word "Man" is in Manners....
←Rate | 12-07-2013 00:31 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kanye West?......I've never heard of her!
←Rate | 12-14-2013 08:30 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Right now a FedEx driver is dropkicking your Christmas gift onto someone's front porch.
←Rate | 12-21-2013 00:13 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went out to a "Soul Food" restaurant for dinner last night. My waiter was African-American and put my food down in front of another white guy who looked nothing like me. I get it now..........Wait, oh sorry, that's not my waiter
←Rate | 12-29-2013 20:47 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay, I am getting really irritated. This is the 5th ATM I've been today that's had "insufficient funds".
←Rate | 12-03-2013 09:37 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon Monopoly has come out with a new version of its board game to commemorate President Obama.....all the properties have half their value and the money has been replaced with foodstamps
←Rate | 12-14-2013 12:11 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're getting old when the hot girls you slept with in high school post fat grandma pictures....
←Rate | 11-25-2013 23:24 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon New Jersey is considering a law that makes it illegal to eat while you're driving. When Governor Chris Cristie heard about it he yelled "Shotgun"
←Rate | 11-29-2013 01:37 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever think that just possibly these milk, bread and toilet paper companies are behind these overestimated, hysteria causing weather reports????
←Rate | 12-10-2013 12:11 by EF Comments (0)  




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