Jeff Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon if I took a drink every time Musburger said "Honey Badger", I would have passed out in the 3rd quarter.
←Rate | 01-10-2012 08:13 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon Every since I bought this shake weight . I'm putting way too much salt on my food!!
←Rate | 08-22-2010 01:26 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon The political frustrations of this week remind me how happy I am to have allegiance to greater kingdom.
←Rate | 06-30-2012 08:21 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon RESEARCH: Tin foil hat club. Too much time on hands club. Lives in parents basement club.
←Rate | 04-22-2014 21:57 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon Im thinking of opening a specialty store that caters to people with A.D.D. I will call it "The Shiny Squirrel". Or I might just throw rocks at this tree.
←Rate | 12-15-2011 16:42 by jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon excuse me ma'am, how many ping pong balls can you fit in your mouth?
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:28 by jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon Your luck is so bad, that if I put a bucket of pu*sy in front of you, you would reach in pull out an a**hole!!
←Rate | 05-27-2010 10:03 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon The Asians haven't been this embarrassed since William Hung was singing "She Bangs, She Bangs"
←Rate | 07-05-2015 19:58 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon I think I see a light at the end of the tunnel...Just hopeing it's my friends with a 2 million watt spotlight and not a train....
←Rate | 10-17-2010 14:52 by Jeff Comments (1)  

   messageicon Of all great losses in life, Time is the most irrecoverable. It can never be redeemed.
←Rate | 06-27-2010 12:53 by jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon I was a little disappointed in my morning.. the crayon said peach.. but it sure didn't taste like peach!
←Rate | 08-14-2010 12:55 by Jeff Comments (1)  

   messageicon Last night went to a corn maze for the first time ever! It was aMAZEing. I thought it would be CORNy, but we had so much fun. They did have a few STALKers, don't worry, I was all EARS. Had a blast!
←Rate | 10-17-2010 01:15 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon Brett Favre told the Vikings he is retiring today, but also said he will sign his new contract by Friday.
←Rate | 08-04-2010 16:14 by Jeff Comments (0)  

   messageicon there is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot
←Rate | 01-25-2014 22:23 by jeff Comments (0)  


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