FLIPPHONESCOTT Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Do you ever take a couple of ibuprofen just in case?
←Rate | 01-10-2012 10:37 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon looking for a female that will go down on me as much as dish network does!
←Rate | 11-05-2012 18:04 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon The truth is, I find it very stressful that Smokey thinks that I'm the only one that can prevent forest fires. I don't feel trained for this, and I certainly didn't sign up for the position.
←Rate | 01-08-2013 18:58 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon my underwear is kinda half- assing it today
←Rate | 01-19-2013 14:01 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon so is anybody in the bathroom,drinking wine out of a red solo cup, hiding from the family yet?
←Rate | 11-26-2015 20:19 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon a man is like a tile floor. lay him right and you can walk on him for 30 years
←Rate | 11-23-2011 12:03 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon No peace at home = no piece at home.
←Rate | 01-10-2012 02:19 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon A toast Gentlemen, To girlfriends and wives. May they never meet
←Rate | 12-19-2011 03:04 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon my thong is trying to get to 5th base
←Rate | 11-26-2011 14:23 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon if any body needs me I will be over here waiting for football season
←Rate | 06-21-2013 14:08 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon for fun put some pop rocks in the cats litter pan
←Rate | 09-09-2012 00:52 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Dear life, When I said "can my day get any worse?" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge."
←Rate | 01-14-2012 12:24 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon I ate 4 cans of alphabet soup,,, and just took probably the biggest vowel movement ever
←Rate | 11-13-2013 17:36 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon Even my dinner tasted like Monday
←Rate | 01-04-2016 21:04 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon "My alarm clock probably thinks I have anger-management issues."
←Rate | 01-21-2012 09:48 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon still rockin the kids table!
←Rate | 11-23-2011 11:51 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon DO YOU THINK BILL CLINTON HAS BEEN HIDING FROM HIS WIFE ALL DAY!
←Rate | 11-09-2016 17:48 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you had to use a treadmill to re charge your cell phone we would all be health nuts!
←Rate | 07-06-2014 22:08 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon have you ever logged on to do a 5 min project on-line and 3 hours later you are kinda suicidal ?
←Rate | 09-23-2012 23:48 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon FYI 'I'm here so I won't get fined'
←Rate | 01-27-2015 21:12 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  




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