@1_Jack_Jacko Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Your password must contain at least 8 letters, a capital, a plot, a protagonist with good character development, a twist and a happy ending
←Rate | 03-17-2015 18:23 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon How is McDonald's delivery not a thing yet? I can order a wife from another country but I can't get someone to bring me a Big Mac?
←Rate | 03-23-2015 15:49 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Picking a president to vote for this term is like picking the STD that I would be the most okay with having
←Rate | 03-02-2016 17:37 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon My roommate is 3 days younger than me so ive gotten in the habit of saying “when I was your age..” and then describing what I did 3 days ago
←Rate | 09-10-2015 14:07 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon For those that don't know, I'm getting married on May 7th. Since it's short notice don't worry about bringing wedding gifts, just bring someone for me to marry. Thanks
←Rate | 04-13-2016 12:06 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Apparently it's Monday today and it's sunny outside. Thanks everyone for that invaluable piece of information
←Rate | 05-19-2014 13:15 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Phones nowadays are so expensive, when you fall and hear a crack, you pray it’s your leg.
←Rate | 10-28-2015 14:52 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon There's no telling what will come out a female's mouth when she's mad at you. You just gotta brace yourself and be ready for anything.
←Rate | 11-12-2014 15:24 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon So many baby mothers post up pictures of their kids everyday.. I'm watching them grow.. I'm technically their step dad
←Rate | 04-06-2014 09:35 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon This post is dedicated to whatever you’re ignoring in real life to read it.
←Rate | 04-14-2014 16:08 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's amazing how the brain works. I heard a song that I haven't heard in about ten years and I remembered it word for word. Yet when it came to my exams I barely even remembered how to hold my pen.
←Rate | 04-19-2014 13:09 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Want to know the best way to make friends? Tell a woman you love her and she will say "I think we're just friends"
←Rate | 05-17-2015 10:00 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Life is great... I don't have kids, aids or ebola.
←Rate | 11-16-2014 17:58 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon 69... Some might call it nasty... I call it a romantic dinner for 2
←Rate | 02-26-2015 13:07 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon if my girl drops $50 while we're walking, then it's her lucky day because I'm picking it up and i'm going to be a great boyfriend and buy her lunch.....
←Rate | 02-12-2015 13:30 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon There are an alarming amount of people getting engaged or married on my Facebook recently. Got my brain ticking with how much thought and planning they must have put into it. I don't even know what I'm having for breakfast tomorrow let alone get married
←Rate | 09-24-2014 14:33 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Your girlfriend could be dumb as anything but the minute you start arguing with her she'll turn into a lawyer with a degree from Cambridge
←Rate | 06-03-2015 13:37 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon My girlfriend wanted to talk to me about how childish I am but she didn't know the password to my pillow fort so she couldn't get in
←Rate | 05-01-2015 07:59 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm drunk and I've got work tomorrow, but on the plus side. I'm having a great conversation with my dog
←Rate | 04-24-2014 15:37 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon My girl has been asleep for 14 hours now. I'm debating trying to wake her in case she's dead. But then again if I do wake her up I'll then be dead..
←Rate | 03-11-2014 16:00 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

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