MigasJoe Funny Status Messages

   Putting a pretty shirt over your muffin top does not make you a cupcake

   If ladies could read my thoughts I would get slapped in the face A LOT!!!

   in just 9 months we will be witness to a population boom known as Shades of Grey Babies

   it just me or does anybody else find it weird that the Mets took out a $40 million dollar loan from Bank of America. Considering that they play at Citi Field????

   they say money can't buy you happiness but it can buy you a sh!t load of bacon and thats pretty damn close

   was thinking about going into politics but I don't think I could ever cheat on my wife

   Kids are looking at Google Earth...I told them when I was growing up my Google Earth consisted of a map, a push pin, and a post it note that said you are here

   just took an inventory of my body and it seems to be overstocked in all the wrong places

   Next time your on a roller coaster take some extra bolts with you then when you're going up that first hill tell the guy in front of you "these just fell out of your chair!!!!"

   worried about his financial future...even Daylight Savings Time has a better plan than me...

   I have washboard abs. They just happen to have a little laundry on them...

   My wife has been worried about her weight...i told her to keep her chins up...

   well Notre Dame fans...In about a year FSU will have to vacate this victory so you have that to look forward to

   Sorry that we haven't named a new Pope yet. We aren't done with all of the background checks.

   Guys, the only thing that beats playing with your kids is playing with the box they came in...

   I married my wife for her looks, just not the ones she has been giving me lately

   There is no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in suck.

   VH1 is playing all Whitney videos right now. I forgot about some of these song. Then again, I forgot what a video was

   all those extreme couponers across together need to band together and propose a budget plan to the president

   Good for Boston...celebrating in the streets like Buckner caught the ball!!!