KISSTOPHER Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'KISSTOPHER': View All Messages
Page: 2 of 35

   messageicon Learning to "stop drop and roll" in elementary school lead me to believe catching on fire would be a much more frequent problem in life.
←Rate | 04-25-2013 13:11 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm running low on funny but I have plenty of sexy left.
←Rate | 04-25-2013 13:06 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are like maths. As soon as you think you've finally figured it out, something harder and more confusing comes along.
←Rate | 04-24-2013 13:30 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't understand why g@y guys won't sleep with women. I mean they have butt-holes too.
←Rate | 04-23-2013 13:06 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My level of sarcasm has reached a dangerous level where even I don't know if I'm kidding or not.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 12:33 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing makes me go from zero to Hitler faster than someone touching my phone.
←Rate | 04-18-2013 01:52 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon 80s music brings me back to good times like when I didn't exist.
←Rate | 04-17-2013 13:18 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you feel you 'have nobody to blame but yourself' you're not trying hard enough. I can always find someone to pin it on.
←Rate | 04-17-2013 13:07 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's so nice to come home and relax with Facebook after a long day at the office being on Facebook.
←Rate | 04-17-2013 09:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon RECYCLING RULE 101: if no one saw what clothes you were wearing today, its totally fine to wear them again tomorrow.
←Rate | 04-15-2013 14:11 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I see ads on TV with smiling, happy housewives using a new cleaning product, the only thing I want to buy are the meds they must be on.
←Rate | 04-15-2013 08:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My tombstone will probably say, "Dead, but finally sober".
←Rate | 04-13-2013 13:18 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon A relationship that’s needs to be validated and reinforced by being constantly paraded on Facebook for the whole world to see is a desperate relationship that will not last.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 12:09 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fellas; Sometimes women say they're fine because they know that's all you really want to hear.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 11:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon There would be peace throughout the world if they gave away free chocolate with every tampon purchase.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 11:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, never give up. If a girl doesn't reply to your text, call her. If she doesn't answer, knock on her door. They love a persistent man.
←Rate | 04-12-2013 15:47 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Menstruation Day 1. Don't touch me Day 2. Hug me Day 3. Don't talk to me Day 4. Why don't you speak to me? Day 5. You never understand me
←Rate | 04-12-2013 05:26 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish more of my handcuff stories involved sex instead of police officers.
←Rate | 04-11-2013 14:48 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best way to ruin my day is by asking me, "How's life treating you?" or "What's new?".
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:47 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you love someone set them free. If they comeback, probably it was a Fast & The Furious Movie.
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:37 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left