ff1241 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I'm smiling on the outside because I have a rainbow of pills on the inside.
←Rate | 12-02-2011 14:05 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Getting some cans of gas to make this years homemade fireworks show more entertaining.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:16 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It only took 6 drinks but I'm starting to feel the Christmas spirit.
←Rate | 12-25-2010 03:07 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what they say "Home is where you hang your enemies head."
←Rate | 07-04-2011 04:38 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone give Bruno Mars a grenade and pull the pin. I'm getting sick of that song. She dosen't love you, I don't wanna hear about how your stalking her.
←Rate | 01-29-2011 23:26 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish cleaning the house was as easy as cleaning out my email.
←Rate | 10-28-2010 14:28 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon is single...but you're welcome to change that as long as your female and emotionally stable without the use of medication.
←Rate | 10-13-2010 18:59 by ff1241 Comments (2)  


   messageicon Why do people complain about how broke/poor they are sitting at the bar drinking beer and smoking cigarettes?
←Rate | 01-13-2012 16:13 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So if you don't know the local language and need to find a restroom. The universal sign is to act like your holding your penis and making a hissing sound. Don't ask me how I know this.
←Rate | 01-29-2011 23:27 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may still be single but I know that I have saved a lot of money on a wedding and even more on the divorce.
←Rate | 12-31-2010 03:14 by ff1241 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because thats the only excuse I have for being drunk at work.
←Rate | 04-10-2012 20:25 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder what I did at work before I had and I-phone and Facebook.
←Rate | 11-28-2011 23:52 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I believe in evolution by natural selection. But I have one big problem with it. Its not fast enough and there are too many safeguards in place not to let nature do its thing.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 20:34 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So you wonder why I never seem to get any sleep. Well I never go to bed angry. I stay up and plot my revenge. So ask yourself something, do I hate alot of people or is one person really going to get it. Now your wondering if its you.
←Rate | 09-19-2011 02:39 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wishing my dog had a snooze button!!
←Rate | 07-07-2011 13:31 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The term weekend could have a whole new meaning tomorrow.
←Rate | 05-20-2011 23:16 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Zombie squirrels will feast on your nuts.
←Rate | 05-17-2011 23:37 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Chocolate chip cookie dough has a warning to not eat it raw. Who in their right mind is not going to do that. I can't even remember the last time I got cookie dough and made them into cookies.
←Rate | 01-29-2011 23:25 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon very surprised at the number of my family members actually willing to admit they are related to me.
←Rate | 04-26-2011 20:04 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drinking is a problem only if you're not good at it. To me, everything you listed is proof that I am very good at it.”
←Rate | 12-01-2010 02:54 by ff1241 Comments (0)  



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