NO BODY Funny Status Messages

   I take very morning that I am able to open my eyes and wake up as another opportunity God has given me to be a better person than I was yesterday.

   facebook messing up your relationship??? well dial this number 1~800~LOG OFF!

   Too many funerals and not enough graduations. Too many baby showers, not enough weddings.

   I may hate myself in the morning but I'm gonna love you tonight.

   If you watch the looting videos in reverse, they are really generous people

   Don't waste your time worrying about a piece of sh*t that's not worried about you.

   Nobody is perfect, but don't use that excuse to cover up your mistakes and stupidity.

   Ladies: Having a male friend is a lot like having a pet tiger. Sure its fun in theory, but you're always waiting for the day it turns on you.

   No strings attached, your love is so wi-fi

   You cannot taste me, until you undress me. Sincerely, banana