Bill Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Wow!! Tension's in Korea is increasing. Rumor has it that France has already offered to surrender........
←Rate | 11-23-2010 14:09 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Early preview of tonight's State Of The Union speech: It sucks. We're broke. Quit bitching. Goodnight.
←Rate | 01-25-2011 20:57 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Celebrating today's unemployment news is like getting excited about all the open tables in the Titanic's dining room, the media appears to be pretending the unemployment rate dropped for some reason other than holiday seasonal staffing.
←Rate | 12-02-2011 10:33 by bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon City of Dallas just announced tomorrow is Lebron James Day. Everyone gets to leave work 12 minutes early.
←Rate | 06-12-2011 23:11 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I was thinking....I bet airfare to Egypt is crazy cheap right about now. I've never seen the pyramids, are they still standing?? Oh never mind, they got no internet, I'M NOT GOING!!!
←Rate | 01-30-2011 19:29 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hate to admit it but i'm in a really dark place right now... oh wait.... found the light switch... phew! never-mind :
←Rate | 11-04-2010 18:26 by bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm saving my April fools joke for tomorrow. No one will see them coming...... ; )
←Rate | 04-01-2011 13:28 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Easter chocolate tastes so much better than normal chocolate...
←Rate | 04-22-2011 06:49 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Got an email about seasonal jobs as a “package handler”. Had to check to make sure it was for UPS and not the TSA…
←Rate | 11-19-2010 14:09 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon If only I had stuck with dodgeball since elementary. I could have gone pro.........
←Rate | 04-19-2011 12:35 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon The Cavs win twice, the Tribe sweeps Boston, the Heat lose and LeBron's mom gets arrested. You can't deny that KARMA Cleveland.......
←Rate | 04-07-2011 15:17 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Got Bin Laden AND interrupted Celebrity Apprentice? Win for Obama all around.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 23:21 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't run from hurricanes, I drink them.........
←Rate | 09-01-2010 09:55 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Don't worry, they'll probably get Casey Anthony when she tries to steal back her sports memorabilia...
←Rate | 07-05-2011 14:57 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I personally think that Hank Jr is just laying the groundwork for a stint on Dancing With the Stars........
←Rate | 10-04-2011 09:39 by bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon ‎ So, did France like lose at rock, paper, scissors or something? I mean France?
←Rate | 03-19-2011 13:38 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hope Obama held the gun sideways when he shot Bin Laden.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 23:49 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinking we need to change the term "Big Brother" to "Creepy Uncle."
←Rate | 11-19-2010 07:32 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon I wonder how many hot dogs Kobayashi sucked down in jail last night??
←Rate | 07-05-2010 08:46 by Bill Comments (0)  

   messageicon Somewhere there's an alien cleaning bird poo off his spaceship right now.
←Rate | 01-04-2011 07:47 by Bill Comments (0)  

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