fadolo Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Got high and let my dog drive us up to Taco Bell. Now he's argueing with the officer that the traffic light wasn't red but gray.
←Rate | 07-25-2013 16:33 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon It takes a smoke detector 4 months to stop beeping if you were wondering how lazy I am.
←Rate | 07-26-2013 21:49 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon "that new iPhone $750? it better play dead if my girl touch it
←Rate | 07-27-2013 16:44 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oven = Xbox for women.
←Rate | 07-27-2013 18:18 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon People, put a dollar in the jar every time you masturbate. Trust me on this. {Sent from my yacht}
←Rate | 07-29-2013 12:30 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon The police showed up and used technical terms like "Stalker" and "PPO" when I thought I was leaving a "Love Note"
←Rate | 07-31-2013 19:49 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you see your girl out in public with another guy, one of yall 3 are supposed to die in that encounter.
←Rate | 08-03-2013 15:45 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Real men sip that capri sun like its the last one left on earth
←Rate | 08-09-2013 01:18 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon When my ex left me I developed an Underground Railroad to sneak into her basement and watch Netflix
←Rate | 08-09-2013 12:23 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girl brought me breakfast in bed, I slowly turned to her and said, ?What are you doing out of the Kitchen??
←Rate | 08-14-2013 18:43 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are like alarm clocks. They won't shut up until you hit them.
←Rate | 08-16-2013 09:43 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon These arrmy commercials always show video game stuff they don't show dudes tryna eat a pizza with no hands when they get back
←Rate | 08-16-2013 16:18 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Me: How much for a wank? Prostitut: $15 Me: Thanks. I don't want one, I just wanted to know how much I was saving every night
←Rate | 08-18-2013 21:32 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon In the business world, the rearview mirror is always clearer than the windshield.
←Rate | 08-19-2013 09:58 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't hold grudges but my ignore game is beast mode
←Rate | 08-20-2013 17:47 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Smoke your dirty weed nobody cares just stop trying to justify it to people who don't smoke
←Rate | 08-28-2013 14:34 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon A nutsack is a guy's Christmas Ornament from God.
←Rate | 09-15-2013 15:56 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon God put a woman in the bible and sheruined the whole book in the first chapter
←Rate | 10-03-2013 08:13 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man if I don't get my ex back today thisis the 742nd last straw!
←Rate | 10-20-2013 08:34 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gas so high in Brockton that it hasn't been a drive-by in 2 months.”
←Rate | 10-22-2013 20:24 by fadolo Comments (0)  




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